Miaowlit

So we live in a rape culture. What would a consent culture look like?

(Source: mar-velez, via compulsive-thrifting)

[TW: violence, suicide]

cuntflavor:

lavender-labia:

pcarasaur:

periodp00ps:

sanityscraps:

periodp00ps:

Why I despise ‘choice feminism’. Shaving and not shaving aren’t equal, so stop pretending like they are.

It’s horrible that people are shamed if they don’t decide to follow societal norms. I agree there. I understand how these norms are restrictive and oppressive as institutions.

But what’s wrong with someone choosing to do so? I choose to shave. I didn’t realize that revoked my feminist license. This girl likes her armpit hair, and that’s fine. I personally hate mine, and that’s fine too. Why can’t everyone just mind their own damn bodies?

Ok it’s my first day of uni tomorrow and it’s already midnight here so i’m not going to get into a big argument like last night! So i’ll try and round up my thoughts now.

Firstly, where did i say you had to be hairy to be a feminist? No feminist licenses are getting revoked today, folks.

“Why can’t everyone just mind their own damn bodies” is a pretty problematic statement. It’s things like this that allow people to continue their routines without challenging them or critically thinking about them in any way. It’s why I hate phrases like “shave or don’t shave, wear makeup or don’t wear makeup, whatever! ^_^ < 333”. It’s so… timid. Moderate. It dances around the issue entirely and blocks debates about oppressive beauty rituals and misogyny. 

The fact is, shaving is the easy option. The safe option. Society backs you up 110% on it. (Hey, whatever, do what you have to do to survive. I cover up my hairy legs in public.)

You will never be verbally or physically abused because of your choice to shave. That still blows my mind - that the least I can expect for being hairy is verbal harrassment, but if I’m unlucky it could be severe physical violence. 

How is a ‘choice’ that is unfluenced by the media, your peers, your parents, your ENTIRE SOCIETY, throughout your ENTIRE life in any way comparable to the choice not to shave? Answer: it’s not. At all. Ever.

You say you’re making a choice. That’s cool. Honestly!  it’s not like I send anon messages to people going “stop shaving u disgusting hairless freak omg wat is wrong with u”. But you’re also doing what you’re told. You’re engaging in a practice that is forced upon people. 

I’ve said it many times on my blog and I’ll say it again: I will NEVER support dominant beauty regimes. People that wear makeup and shave and wear painful heels are congratulated enough irl - you have the whole of society backing you up. People that choose to be hairy do not have that luxury. So of course it’s fine that you shave - society’s told you that quite literally since you were a baby.

Oh, and to anyone out there that’s curious about growing their body hair: DO IT. I convinced myself that I hated body hair. That I ‘preferred’ to be smooth. But once I started growing it out, I realised how luscious and fuzzy and amazing the stuff is! Plus, it’s far less time contorting yourself into ridiculous positions trying to violently remove what is naturally a part of you.

Exactly. Saying “it doesn’t matter whether or not people shave” is to compare the two as if they were equally acceptable options. Maybe to you it doesn’t matter, but 98% of western society cares an awful fucking lot.

I dare anyone who disagrees to stop shaving for two months, go out in public displaying that body hair, and come back to me saying that it doesn’t matter.

This is a really interesting discussion. Hope it’s okay if I add my two cents.

I’ve been on all sides of the fence: passionately hating my body hair because society tells me it’s disgusting; growing out my body hair whilst embracing and flaunting it; and periods of being ambivalent about it (shaving from time to time but not really caring what stage it was at). At the moment I shave my armpits and legs but nothing else. This is mainly because I have textural/sensation difficulties when my leg and armpit hair gets long. In this sense, and because I have experienced both sides of the issue, I do see my decision as a genuinely free choice that isn’t being socialised into me. 

I also think there are other reasons for shaving that fall outside the spectrum of oppressive beauty standards (an obvious one being professional athletes who compete in swimming or cycling events). Because of these sorts of reasons, I think it’s unfair to say that people who do shave are slaves to those beauty standards. You can never know other people’s reasons.

I, too, agree about not shutting down discussion by saying “it doesn’t matter”. Obviously it matters. I mean there are a fuckload of people out there who find the idea of not shaving to be completely abhorrent. These are people who react to body hair as if it somehow challenges them on a very personal level; they almost find it threatening. That shit is fucked up. So, yes, all choices matter. As do the dynamics that come into play when making those choices. 

I also think, though, it’s infantalising to claim no one is capable of making a truly free choice. That sort of rhetoric completely removes any notion of personal agency and I think that’s quite patronising. I’ve posted about this idea before and it’s still something I believe quite strongly. I think it is definitely possible to critique and analyse beauty standards - and then to make personal decisions about those standards without being strictly limited by societal expectations. Maybe that’s naive or optimistic of me…I guess it’s not really something that can be proved either way. 

I guess it boils down to whether you value subversion over conformity, or whether you see those actions as equal (or at least acknowledge contexts where they can be equal). 

I am perturbed. 

Very, perturbed.

Okay, so shaving/not shaving: I am not familiar with “choice feminism.” Like, isn’t feminism the movement to make sure women have choices? I don’t even understand this, but ok. So I don’t shave a lot. I am pretty hairy. But I do shave sometimes because it’s fun to see how smooth my legs can get. But then I stop shaving. It’s a pattern for me and so it is a pattern for a lot of other people too. Yeah, shaving has its roots in patriarchal standards but so do a lot of things like, oh uh : MARRIAGE. But if I went around telling people they are taking part in choice feminism because they decide to get married that would be really fucked up, right? Okay, so shaving/not shaving is a choice women have and they can or can’t do it. I do not care what you do honestly, there are more things I’d rather be worrying about.

The comments up above are bordering on femme phobia. Make up? Seriously? Okay, okay. I understand the beauty standards of society are really fucked up. I get that, totally. But what I don’t want to hear is that because i like to get dressed up and put on make up that somehow I am giving in to patriarchal standards. I’m not. I ID as femme and you are seriously erasing my identity by saying that. So. Fucked. Up.

This reeks.

reblogging for lavender-labia’s brilliant commentary

(via gutsyfemme-deactivated20120302)